6
The Mane Event’s Fun Stuff
Useless Trivia
Dear...Someone?
Once, I accidentally tried to unlock my house with
my car keys. I started my house up. So I drove
around for a while, and then parked on the free
way and started yelling at everyone.
“GET OUT
OF MY DRIVEWAY!”
Steven Wright
Before Stonehenge, there was a woodhenge, and
then a strawhenge, but then the big bad wolf blew
them down and the three little pigs had to be relo
cated to the projects. Eddie Izzard
I carry a lighter in my back pocket. I don’t smoke,
I just like certain songs. Demetri Marten
This shirt is dry clean only. Which means...it’s dirty.
Mitch Hedberg
My father was a beekeeper and his father before
him. I’d like to follow in their footsteps, and they
went a little something like this: *runs across the
stage*
AHHHH! HELP! I’M COVERED IN
BEEEES
! Eddie Izzard
They say guns don’t kill people; people kill
people. But I think the gun helps, you know?
Standing around pointing at people and going
“BANG!”
Isn’t going to do much, is it? You’d
have to be real dodgy in the heart to have that.
Eddie Izzard
Crabs pee through their eyes.
Winston Churchill was born in a bathroom at a
party.
A pig’s snout is called a gruntle.
Bananas grow pointing upwards.
Giraffes can’t swim.
The cucumber is actually a fruit.
More people are killed by bees than snakes.
Zebras are white with black stripes.
A snail can have up to 25,000 teeth.
An American aircraft managed to shoot itself
down by accident in the Vietnam War.
Pogonophobia is the fear of beards.
The Cowboys beat the Giants
10. Light travels faster than sound. This is why
some people appear bright until you hear them
speak.
9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To
steal ideas from many is research.
8. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise
my hands.
7. The surest sign that there is intelligent life some
where in the Universe is that it hasn’t tried to
contact us.
6. Duct tape is like the force, it has a Light side and
a Dark side and it holds the Universe together.
5. Quantum Particles: the dreams that stuff is made
of.
4. There’s no such thing as a great discovery; there
are just very fortunate accidents.
3. Photons have mass?! I didn’t even know they
were Catholic...
2. I have not failed. I have just found ten thousand
ways that will not work.
1. It has recently been discovered that research
causes cancer in rats.
Silly Quotes
Some Funny Theories
Chris Petty, Sophomore
Paws Up
Paws Down
To the Volleyball Team for winning a
Sectional Title and for their Wins over
HAC and Webster Christian!
To Katelyn Beman for her terrific perfor
mance in the Cross Country Sectionals and
States!
To all benchmark students who worked
so hard to complete their tasks on time.
To all the students participating in sports,
the musical, and other school activities.
To the lazy seniors who blew off their
benchmark.
To the coming of winter weather, yuck!
Pros:
•
Good predator design
•
Cool weapons
Cons:
•
Faulty camera angles
•
Some dated graphics
•
Terrible sound and voice acting
•
Sluggish button commands
Final V
erdict:
4.5
Different View of
“Predator;
Concrete Jungle”
Anonymous
If you’re going to write it, own it.
Funny Fotos
Summary:
You are Ethan Cole, a soldier sent into
the underground military base of Area 51. You have
no clue what your mission is, but you have heard ru
mors that have come out of there. When you get down
there, you are thrown into immediate action, fighting
hordes of humans who have been infected with a vi
rus that alters their body structure making them stron
ger yet very stupid, although some can use guns.
Things don’t start off that great either; pretty much
first thing your buddy gets his head ripped off, and
you get infected; however, by the means of a rare
genotype, you gain the ability to mutate at will into
one of the creatures. To make things worse, not only
do you deal with infectious humans, it turns out Area
51 was built on top of an alien colony, and they want
their revenge. Oh joy!
Gameplay:
Okay, looking for a game that has a wide
choice of weaponry… this isn’t it. There are a total
of six different weapons and two types of grenades.
All the weapons have a melee function, and you can
go dual fire action as long as you have two of the
same guns. There is never a dull moment! When you
think you have killed all the enemies in one area, more
will show up. Where the game lacks in weaponry it
makes up in voice acting. David Duchovney (Agent
Mulder from
“The XFiles”
and the main character
from
“XIII”
) does the voice for Cole, which is so
flipping cool. When you scan someone, they interact
by saying something hilarious like
“A little to the
left.”
or
“That feels so good, yet so awkward.”
Ranking:
I give “Area 51” an 8 out of 10!
Next Month:
“Ultimate Spider Man”
PS2 Review
Chris Petty, Sophomore
This months game: “Area 51”
What do you do when you are sad and the people
around you won’t leave you alone?
*Be thankful you have people around who care*
*If one of your friends was sad, wouldn’t you want
to know what happened*
*If you are really truly that sad and don’t want to
share your problems with your friends, maybe you
should seek help with parents or professionals in
your school*
What do you do when you think you have an
undiagnosed mental illness?
*First find out if you do or not by seeking profes
sional help*
*If you think you have something wrong, chances
are you probably do*
*Check out your own symptoms on web MD; be
come educated on your illness, if you have one*
*There’s no harm in seeking help from a mental
illness. Lots of harm can be done if you don’t!!
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